It’s been 6 months!

Oh wow time has really flown by this year…In the blink of an eye, I’ve already been working for 6 months! There’s really so much to give thanks to God for.

It is really amazing to see how He has sustained me and helped me all this time at work. Couple of examples:

  1. Times where it seemed like my cleaning session was going to be a mess, but things turned out well in the end.
  2. The time when I had high rate of volunteer and Champions (our regular volunteers) drop out, but everything kinda worked out in the end because there was also a homeowner who pulled out of the session last minute.
  3. The other time that there was a homeowner drop out last minute on cleaning day (just last week actually, lol), and we randomly met a Lions Befriender at the void deck, and he was able to help us approach 2 seniors on his list, and they were willing to let us go in and help clean their houses even though it was so last minute!
  4. Good work colleagues!!!!! Still think it’s really amazing how there is like no politics in our office! It’s most probably because everyone has the same goal in mind – to put God’s love into action, by bringing people together to build (or in our case, clean) homes, communities and hope.

Also, one thing that I really liked about starting work was, having time (and more importantly, money LOL!) to pursue interests and things that I never had the time to do before! I’ve managed to take up Guzheng lessons again (It’s been 8 long years since I’ve touched it in Secondary school), and I’ve also started gymming more regularly (trying to keep fit heh!) The downside, I guess, is that with all this extra money, I’ve also been online shopping a lot :/ bad habit that I really need to curb..

The other downside, and the far more important one, is that after starting all these activities, I’ve not been spending too much time with God, and it’s something I really really want to work on! Going to start setting aside time everyday to do my QT, read the word, and talk to God. Hoping to start reading more christian lit too..have bought so many books from Logos Hope, but it’s all just sitting on my shelf lol.

Father, I thank You for sustaining me all this time, and for helping me so much even though I’m so unworthy. Give me the discipline to set aside (and follow) time every day to spend with You, and grant me the desire to want to know You more and more.

Memories

It’s 4am and I should be asleep.After all, I have to be awake in 2 hours to catch a flight.
But I can’t seem to fall asleep no matter how hard I try.
Maybe it’s the coffee that I stupidly drank after dinner.
Or maybe, it’s because I’ll be returning to Hong Kong tomorrow, the place where the best 3 months of my life started. I honestly thought I was over it. It was one of the best experiences I’ve ever had, and I was honestly sad to leave though I did not show it.
I thought I was okay with goodbyes. But now I realise, I’m really not. All I’m good at is burying those feelings of sadness deep inside me, pretending I’m okay, when I’m really not.
I have mixed feelings about this trip. I’m excited to be making new memories with the friends I’ll be holidaying with, and yet I feel somehow sad, that when I go back to the harbour, I know I won’t see the ship that I once called home docked there, waiting for me to board.

I’m sorry my thoughts are all over the place. Maybe it’s really just the coffee.

God knows..

Saw this image that a friend shared on Facebook today..

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and after reflecting a little on those words, I thought of how wrong it all was..so I decided to make some changes to the image, and came up with this:

God knows

haha, I was bored, but..hope this encourages someone today 🙂

Bored

I’ve been feeling really, really bored the past few days! It got so bad that last night, I actually had a random itch to do math problem sums LOL and I even entertained the thought of going down to Popular and buying a math assessment book. Something wrong with me hahaha!

But seriously though..I think this has got to do with my life on the ship heh. Before going on the ship, I know I could have done what I’m doing now and not have a problem with it..like I can nua and laze in bed all day doing nothing for weeks and not be bored. But life on the ship was always so fast paced..there was something to do all the time. From working, to going out to do ministry, or even the many community events we have at night/during sailing. After having that kind of lifestyle for 3 months, it seems harder to just nua and do nothing at home lol..time to look for a job..meh.

 

#prayforourworld

Let us pray, not just for France, but also for Beirut (Lebanon) and Baghdad. These two countries had also experienced terror attacks just the day before the bombings and attacked happened in Paris…but they were not reported widely in the news. What makes these countries any less worthy of our prayers?

Let us pray, not just for France, but for the civil war that is still happening in Syria, where 12 million Syrians (half of which are children) have fled their homes due to conflict. Where winter is approaching, but they do not have proper shelters or clothing to protect themselves from the weather. What makes them any less worthy of our prayers?

Let us pray, not just for France, but for the world. We are living in a world where sin and corruption is abundant. Where people, with the poor excuse of religion, have no qualms about murdering and killing other people. We pray for the victims, why do we not pray for the attackers too? Are they any less of a human being than us? Are they less worthy of our prayers?

I’ve honestly been quite shaken from reading the news from the past couple of days. Mostly because i have a friend in Paris. A friend that I’ve made during my time onboard Logos Hope. Yesterday when I woke up, I opened my email and the first thing I saw was an email from a friend from our STEP programme, asking about the safety of this friend from Paris. I was stunned, and had no idea what was going on. After catching myself up with the news, I started praying for my friend, that she would be safe, and for the people in Paris, that God would bring comfort to them. When the email from our friend finally came, updating us that she was alright and had gotten home before the attacks happened, I was filled with relief. And as I scrolled through Facebook and Instagram, I saw people posting hashtags and adding a filter to their profile pictures in support of France. After awhile, other articles surfaced, articles about Beirut and Baghdad and how they had also experienced the same terror attacks, but were not reported widely in mainstream media. And I felt guilty, guilty that I had only cared about France because I had a friend there. And then I realised that in the past, I hadn’t really cared about reports such as this..simply because it did not affect me personally. And immediately I felt guilty and selfish.

Father, I pray for everything that is happening in the world right now. Father we do not know, and will probably never know why you have allowed such horrible things to happen, why so many innocent people are being killed. But Father, we trust that it is all under your control, and that you have allowed them to happen for a reason. Father, you have created us, and loved us, loved us enough to send your only Son to die on the cross for our sis. You love us enough to give us free will, only for us to turn against each other and commit crimes against each other. I’m sorry Lord. Father I pray for the people in Paris, Beirut, Baghdad, Syria and other cities and countries I may not know about, I pray that the people will find comfort in you Lord, that they will place their hope in you Lord. I pray for protection over them against any other attacks. And Lord, for the people who have committed these acts, I pray that you will somehow open their eyes, so that they may see that what they are doing is wrong, that they may see that what they believe in is wrong. I pray that we will stop playing the blame game, that we will stop looking at each other with prejudiced lenses, and stop blaming any particular group of people for what is happening, But that instead, we will use this opportunity to come together and unite as your people. 

Lord my words are inadequate in expressing my thoughts and feelings, and my mind is muddled. I do not know how else to pray. But Lord, in all, Your will be done. 

Last day

So today was officially my last day working as a part time waitress. It’s been a good 5 years since I’ve been in the service industry and I think I can safely say that I’ve seen all. kinds. of. people. Like for real lol. I think now is a good time to quit before I start to get even more jaded.

I remember in the first 2 years or so that I worked, I really did become more patient after dealing with certain customers..but now after 5 years, I find myself getting annoyed and pissed off more often, even to the point of almost losing my temper. The way some customers act can really make you lose your faith in humanity (cliche as that phrase sounds, it’s true though)

But of course, there were also many nice customers who can really make your day.

All I can say is, there’s a bittersweet feeling about leaving a job that you’ve done for so long. Can’t hate it, can’t love it lol. But really, it’s been a good 5 years. And now it’s time to look forward to a new chapter of full time work in my life 🙂

2(.30)am Musings

During the period when I was in Melbourne, I was always complaining a lot and counting down to the day that I would step foot back in Singapore. I prided myself in being a very patriotic person (lol!)..and my friends all knew it too.

But somehow, I know a little part of me has been left at that place I’ve called home for 1 and a half years. A little part of me will always miss that place. And more so than ever, a little part of me will always want to turn back time to when I was there. To cherish the moments I’ve had there and the friends I’ve made.

It’s 2.30am. I should sleep.